March

I laughed, I cried, I ate tacos, and I felt scared, but remembered I am safe. I thought a lot about four years ago, when I called Hazleton because I needed help, never picturing Zoom IOP from my pantry, a self-imposed shame cave. Then, the diagnoses: PTSD and CPTSD. I wanted to disappear. My treatment plan stated, 'I've lost my place in the world.' Now, I realize I have made it back to life. I launched my website, telling the world: I am here! I am well, I have healed, I have created a completely new life. I laughed at the absurdity of life, I worked on my marriage, I sat in the sun on 50-degree days with my cat, I painted flowers in my pajamas, I tried to be a good friend, and I watched period dramas while embroidering. I healed a little more. I went up north to our favorite place, Cove Point. Sitting on the couch, listening to the waves, I'm writing a gratitude list and thinking about what I want to do in April.

Xoxoxoxo, BE"